Michael and I are going to do our first month of IUI. I'm completely confused by my doctor and what's supposed to happen and when, but we're going to continue with this month anyway. Can't say I'm terribly excited. Not to be a drama queen or anything, but I'm beginning to think it just may not happen. I hate the emotional roller coaster every month. I've decided I'm just going to start making plans without considering whether or not I'll be pregnant. It gets old after awhile...o we can't do this because we might be pregnant...and then find out a few days later we weren't even pregnant (this is a re-occurring thing almost every month). Then I just feel plain stupid for even thinking that I could be pregnant. So, that's where we're at. Sometimes I think it would just be easier to handle if Michael and I were the ones deciding we didn't want another child at this time. I've tried to convince myself of that many times. Hasn't worked yet.

So many more things to say, but it's late and I have work tomorrow. Please pray that God gives me peace and strength-I seem to be low on both right now.